As I sit and reflect on this day I am over joyed by God’s goodness to us. I was told that being a grandparent was the greatest thing in the world but I did not understand it. I mean how could it be as good as being a parent. Would I feel the same love for her as I did with my children or would she be this stranger that I would learn to love? All these questions filled my mind as I anticipated her arrival. As I sat praying for my daughter who was in the throes of labor, I was torn between two emotions, The helplessness of knowing that my baby was in pain and I could do nothing to help her but pray. Yet at the same time feeling unbridled excitement because I knew this pain was bringing me closer to meeting my grand daughter for the first time. It was hard waiting, the minutes felt like hours and I could not sit still. Finally when I was able to come into the room, I was taken back with the view of my baby holding her baby. I was so proud of her and knew instantly by her eyes that she loved that baby beyond description. She held her out to me and I took her into my arms and gazed at her face, so beautiful were my first thoughts. My Ellie baby was here, I kissed her warm cheek and could not hold back the tears that washed over us both. I instantly knew I was in love with this child, and I would do absolutely everything I could to show her how much I loved her and how precious she was to God and to us. And I also knew she could do absolutely nothing to cause me to love her less, just as I love my children. Yet there was something more, a special bond, a relationship that was free to love and enjoy each other without the self imposed pressures I put on myself when raising my children. I was meant to be Grammy not Mommy, yippee! I could do anything for her without having to second guess myself on whether it was good for her or not. I knew I would not do anything to hurt her, but also knew I could do anything to spoil her in a good way. What joy there is in that. Now as she turns one, I see how fast time does pass. She is still that beautiful baby, but now I see that beauty inside as well as outside. She is determined much like her parents which when tempered by the Holy Spirit will allow her to do great things for God as they do. What joy will be mine to see her grow each year and her parents with her. I understand Proverbs 17:6 much better now “Children’s children are a crown to the aged”. Thank you God for crowning me with Elena Joy
Grammy and Ellie
